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Our lives are based on relationships. Relationships with our families, colleagues, friends, lovers and especially the relationships we have with ourselves...

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Stress Management

Stress is like a computer system that is ready to crash. It is overworked, has too many apps open, the cache hasn’t been cleared out and it is overdue for a good old fashioned system...

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Cultural Confusion

Children & Families of First Generation Immigrants may find it really hard to be torn between two cultures. From one aspect you may be trying to satisfy the demands of...

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Understanding Emotional Coping:

We develop maladaptive coping skills when we are faced with feelings that we don’t know what to do with, so we use the only tools we know, resulting in stress, relationships issues, and confusion. When we use the right emotional coping tools, we can feel more relief, harmony and clarity.


The BODY requires FOOD, EXERCISE, REST to function properly.

When used for emotional coping, it results in maladaptive emotional coping skills along with some shortcomings. 

(FOOD) - Trying to eat away our emotions

  • Emotional eating gives temporary immediate good feelings follow by weight gain and health problems and shortly after finishing the food the uncomfortable feelings return

(EXERCISE) - Exercising vigorously

  • Over exercising may result in physical fatigue or injury and is not accessible all the time, when in an office setting or at certain events, it may not be possible to do jumping jacks or go for a run

(REST) - Numbing ourselves by sleeping excessively

  • Oversleeping is a form of escapism and leaves people feeling even more tired because they wake up to the same underlying problem and experience poor quality of sleep by waking up with the same uncomfortable feeling they tried to sleep away

The MIND requires THINKING, LOGIC, REASON to function properly.

When used for emotional coping, it results in maladaptive emotional coping skills along with some shortcomings. 

(THINKING) - We attempt to think our way through an emotion

  • Thinking about a feeling is intellectualizing it and does not address the emotion we may grow insight towards our feelings and be able to understand them, but continue to feel uncomfortable

(LOGIC) - We may try to figure out why we feel a certain way

  • Figuring out why we feel a certain way may lead to victim mentality and keeps us stuck in a very uncomfortable feeling along with very uncomfortable remembrance of back trauma or abuse 

(REASON) - We rationalize our behavior and motives

  • We continue to find excuses to maintain negative patterns and may even label ourselves with a mental health diagnosis, justify the way we feel due to that label and continue to feel the same uncomfortable feelings

Our EMOTIONS require VALIDATION, FEELING, EXPERIENCING to function properly.

When learned properly many have reduced drugs/alcohol use, have healthier relationship with food, and overall feeling better with healthier and more fulfilling relationships and lives. 

(VALIDATION) - Validation of the feelings - being non-judgmental

  • Giving myself permission to feel the feeling that is happening and not giving myself a hard time for feeling a certain way (ie angry, sad, jealous, etc)

(FEELING) - Feeling of the emotions - containing the feelings

  • Being able to tolerate the experience of the feeling and sitting with the feeling until in naturally passes the way a wave passes through us, feelings pass through us like waves

(EXPERIENCING) - Accepting the experience because it is happening right now - being present

  • Simply going through the experience because it is happening, sort of the way a child goes through a temper tantrum and is done with the event after the tantrum

How is this done?

  • Contact Now to find out how and to get your FREE consultation.